Review Mode

Review Mode: You’ve Gotta Wait 'Til You’re Friends to Be That Mean

Pro tip: if there’s someone you want to get to know better, then the first words you ever say to them probably shouldn’t be “My GOD, you’re so…

Feb 24 • Carson Olshansky

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Review Mode: Sorry That I Fist-Bump-Zoned You, Bro

When I went in for the fist bump instead of the hug, what I meant to communicate was “I’m not a girl,” not “I’m not your friend.”

Feb 10 • Carson Olshansky

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January 2026

Review Mode: This Conversation Could’ve Been a Journal Entry

The problem with me not processing my feelings is that they become the wrong people’s problem.

Jan 27 • Carson Olshansky

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Review Mode: Hang On, Do I Need to Be the Man Here?

I'm really not sure what I was supposed to do when a creepy guy started aggressively hitting on my male date in front of me.

Jan 13 • Carson Olshansky

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December 2025

Review Mode: Well, I Wish I Hadn’t Let You See That

About once a year, I’ll flirt with a ridiculous person for attention. Unfortunately, 2025’s display had witnesses.

Dec 30, 2025 • Carson Olshansky

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Review Mode: Were We Supposed to Hug Too?

When I'm an acquaintance stuck in a circle of actual friends, maybe I’m supposed to pretend not to notice the disparity.

Dec 16, 2025 • Carson Olshansky

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Review Mode: The Thanksgiving Table Is Not the Place for Hard Conversations

I’m usually proud of myself when I muster the courage to tell someone how their actions made me feel. Less so when I do it in the middle of a crowded…

Dec 2, 2025 • Carson Olshansky

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November 2025

Review Mode: Stop Trying the Vulnerability Move on Cool People

If insanity is trying the same thing over and over and expecting different results, then I’m insane for STILL trying to be relatably awkward with super…

Nov 18, 2025 • Carson Olshansky

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Review Mode: People Don't Wanna Hear Your Whole Halloween Thought Process

When someone asks you, “What are you dressed up as?” they’re looking for an answer, not a spiel.

Nov 4, 2025 • Carson Olshansky

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October 2025

Review Mode: Dammit, I Knew I Should’ve Just Asked

…before ending up on another totally preventable date with a straight dude

Oct 21, 2025 • Carson Olshansky

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Review Mode: Nobody Asked You for a Dissertation

Or how I disclaimer-ed the fck out of my answer when I agreed to do a neurodivergent comedy show.

Oct 7, 2025 • Carson Olshansky

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September 2025

Review Mode: “So, What’s Your Escape Plan?” Isn’t Good Small Talk

Welcome aboard the bummer train to Despair City, making all local stops.

Sep 23, 2025 • Carson Olshansky

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