
And in her time
Will she hear the bells ring
for freedom,
Will she hear the cries for love
be quenched
With the cool, cool waters of acceptance,
Will she hear her own voice
and trust its power,
Will she hear its truth?
©Ashley Castle Barnes

And in her time
Will she hear the bells ring
for freedom,
Will she hear the cries for love
be quenched
With the cool, cool waters of acceptance,
Will she hear her own voice
and trust its power,
Will she hear its truth?
©Ashley Castle Barnes

She tries to imagine
Her way out
Her mind heavy with visions
Of peace, love, radical acceptance
But she knows
As she treads along the path
That one sacred foot in front of the other
Is the only way through
©Ashley Castle Barnes

What if it’s not
All or nothing?
What if she softens
Into the gray dawn
Of acceptance
Knowing all things can be
In the in-between
And she can be too
©Ashley Castle Barnes
For as long as I can remember, I’ve been all or nothing.
It literally pains me to do something part-ways. If I can’t finish it, I don’t want to start it.
You can see how that would be challenging, even debilitating.
I’d love to say it’s some kind of trauma response that could be processed enough to get past it. Maybe it is, but so far that hasn’t changed it.
In reality, I think it’s just how I’m wired. If I start something and don’t have time to finish it, I lose focus when I try to come back it. Whatever inspiration I had is often lost, and is rarely recovered.
But accepting this opens new doors for moving forward.
There’s nothing wrong, I just have to find creative ways to work with this natural inclination, the most important being to not fight it.
To let it be.
To let me be.
And trust that magic can and does happen in the foggy, gray in-between where nothing is certain, and sometimes, nothing is finished.
How are you leaning into this space today?

Dropping down
Dropping in
She feels the pinch
She draws it in
Breathing down
Breathing in
She feels the sting
Her soul takes wing
©Ashley Barnes

The pain of the new
Is not nearly so painful
As the pain of staying in a place
Outgrown long ago
Disarmed by that knowing
She knowingly accepts
A new vision of herself

And one day she woke up,
Reaching out for the warm embrace
Of permanency and finding only sand
Sifting through her fingers
And though she mourned her loss
She determined if sand is what she had
She might as well embrace that too

The Angels remind us to balance our short-term goals against the reality of our lives. We can keep striving, keep moving forward, and also embrace our current experience for what it is, a sacred stepping stone to the next level.

The Angels remind us that we never really know what someone’s life is truly like until we take the time to listen to their lived experience, without judgement or a desire to fix. Only then can we appreciate that their differences are ok, and so are ours.

The Angels remind us to take a moment and gaze at the leafless trees and empty flower beds, to feel the cold night chill and early morning crunch of frosty grass. These too, carry their own beauty, their own divinity, as do all the winters of our lives.

The Angels remind us that people will do what they do, and we can’t control them or make them bend to our will. Our role is acceptance and moving on, with or without them.